Come On, Baby!

Two babies.  Two.  It's a little different than just one.  The first one went pretty well.  Having Burl seemed to improve our lives-make it better, richer, and somewhat easier.  It helped that he was just about the easiest baby ever.  Slept through the night at 5 weeks, hardly cried, nursed like a champ, had lots of family to help-all the good stuff.  

He just came out laid back.  Anymore laid back and I would have expected him to throw a peace sign up and asked where the incense was.  He taught me a thing or two about chillaxin'.

With baby #2 just six(ish) weeks away, I'm thinking about life with two.  

can I do it? 

will I ever have alone time again?

will I walk around like a zomby?

what will Burl do while I nurse?

how will I handle anything harder than Burl?

how fast can I get a runner's body after birth even though I didn't have one to start with?

When those questions roll around in my head, all I hear are the discouraging things people have told me-I'll never have a baby as easy as Burl, going from 1 to 2 babies was the hardest adjustment, there will never be time for napping, Burl is going to lose his mind with jealousy, and losing the baby weight after 30 is not the same.  And some of those or all of them, might be very true.

But, as I see pictures of Burl as a newborn, as I feel her move inside me, as I unfold these concerns to John, I'm reminded of the complete and utter joy that comes with the miracle of birth.  Of having another one!  I'm clinging to the truth that my friend (Juli A.) told me after I met her #2, with tears in her eyes, all she felt was ABUNDANCE.  She kept saying that word over and over.  I'm clinging to the fact that I know that having babies is just plain awesome.  Complete miracle.  Complete Gift.  And I'm ready to receive it.  

When I get overwhelmed, the Lord sends people in my life like John and Lauren and others who affirm me beyond belief.  I'll remember those times-

That pregnancy meltdown I had a few weeks ago, where John hugged me and reminded me that I had the same concerns before Burl and look how great that turned out.  All that needed was this song playing in the background.

That email exchange with Lauren where I told her all my fears and she replied back telling me that I was going to make it and I'm going to do great.  It rivaled this speech for the award for most compelling.

Then, there are those friends who remind me that God shows up big time to give us strength and grace to do it.  To make it.  Even though sometimes "the truth bats last," (words from Anne Lamott's Grace Eventually) I'm going to try and focus on that.  I'm going to cling to the reality that I can't do it, but I've got help from Someone who has the strength, the love, and the grace to get me through it.  

Come.On.Baby.